What if Fear Didn’t Stop You?

We all have things we’d like to do, but fear stops us in our tracks. Fear has a place in our lives – it keeps us from making the same mistakes over again (like touching a hot stove) or doing things that put our life in jeopardy (like crossing busy highways). So, in and of itself, fear is not bad. But sometimes fear is delivered to us through our ego. There’s something we want to do, but somewhere in our mind we hear, “well if that fails, you’re going to look like an idiot,” or “what will people think of you?” It’s the Ego Fear that we have to try to get control of.

Do any of these situations resonate with you:

  • You want to start going to the gym – Ego Fear says, “Everyone’s going to stare at you” or “You’re going to look ridiculous trying to use all that complicated equipment.”
  • You have a question – Ego Fear says, “You don’t have enough information yet, just be quiet so you don’t look like a fool” or “Everyone else probably knows the answer and you’re going to look stupid for asking it.
  • A job opened up that you’d like to interview for – Ego Fear says, “You are nowhere as skilled as Jill, don’t bother applying” or “you don’t have a degree in that and it says one is desired.”
  • You want to try a new hobby – Ego Fear says, “Ballroom dancing? You have two left feet!” or “You’re terrible at keeping things alive and now you want to garden? What will the neighbors think?”
  • You’d like to meet new people – Ego Fear says, “You know how socially awkward you can be, save yourself the embarrassment” or “You’re so boring, what will you talk about?”
  • You want to start a business – Ego Fear says, “Sure, pyramid schemes are a great idea – Sucker!” or “Who’s going to buy from you? You’re not an expert in that field.”
  • You want to create a public workshop – Ego Fear says, “Who’s going to go to that? Maybe your mom and best friends will go just so you don’t feel bad” or “You’re out of your element here – you don’t even know people in this town.”
  • You want to say “No” to a request – Ego Fear says, “If you say ‘no’ they’re going to think you’re a bad person” or “Everyone thinks you’re so nice, saying ‘no’ will ruin that.”

While Ego Fear is trying to protect us, it assumes we need protection. It leads us right to the worst case scenario of a situation and makes mountains out of molehills. Ego Fear works in partnership with our inner critic, and if we give them control of our lives, they’ll take it. Then someday, you’ll look back and wonder what the hell you were so afraid of. You’ll wish you took those leaps. Looking back on your life now, even momentary blunders that felt embarrassing at the time, aren’t even a big deal anymore, right?

Courage is a muscle, and we have to use it to push through our ego fears. In Jia Jiang’s book, “Rejection Proof: How I Beat Fear and Became Invincible Through 100 Days of Rejection,” he literally made every effort to be rejected so he could “thicken his skin” and worry less about failure. He walked up to random houses and asked if he could practice soccer in their backyard; he asked strangers if he could borrow $100; he asked a dog groomer if they could give him a haircut. What he discovered was that most people were very nice, or at least not rude. He learned that his Ego Fear was way off base most of the time and was keeping him from living fully.

Don’t you think it’s time to stop letting your Ego Fear make your decisions? Don’t you think it’s time to know, once and for all, if that idea could really be a huge success? Try. That’s all you have to do. Try. Thank your Ego Fear for trying to protect you, but ask it to kindly zip it because you have work to do.

What’s something you’d try if your Ego Fear stepped out of your way?  Or, what’s something you finally did, in spite of your Ego Fear’s warnings, and found great benefits or success in? Share in the comments section.

If you would like to work together and kick your Ego Fear to the curb, then an Empowerment Session is for you! Take advantage of the complimentary strategy session!

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email April@AuthenticLifeChronicles.com 


  1. Fear is our biggest enemy. When I thought of starting my own business, I have my fair share of critics, fears and doubts. Every time I have some new ideas, Mr fear says “what if they fails, and what if nobody wants what I provide”. Over the years I have grown a thick skin and am not worry too much about failure, because the reality is diferent than we make it out to be.

    • So common those nasty little doubts are in our head sometimes! Thanks for sharing, Erin, and I’m so glad you’ve thickened your skin to let thoughts like those bounce right off!

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