I’m Rubber You’re Glue…For Grown-ups

“I’m rubber, you’re glue, whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you”.  Remember saying that or some similar discourse to a child who was saying mean things to you?  I’ve found it to be equally true in what you think as well.  I recall working for a particularly mean-spirited supervisor.  This was a person I had such little respect for and really wanted to say, “Just so you know, I think you suck…hard.”  But being a reasonably sensible person even when instigated, I just thought it, and many more colorful things to boot.  I deplore the word and emotion “hate” and never wish harm on another person (OK, I may have at one time wished a 2am stubbed toe on the metal frame of a bed, but never with a lasting injury).

As I felt all sense of power and control slipping through my fingers with this person, I would reclaim it daily by thinking even more outrageous, insulting and demeaning statements each time I caught sight of them.  I found it especially satisfying when I had the opportunity to think these things “at” them while directly looking in their eyes with a contrite smile on my face.  But as time went on, I found myself even more unhappy. Returning to this place day after day, my fantastical one-sided colloquy getting more and more bitter at every interaction with this demonized supervisor didn’t seem to be serving me at all.  (Inhale here). This introspection led me to realize I wasn’t “winning”, in fact, I had added my own mind to this person’s army.  By living in my head with this person, in battle, on such a regular basis, I was not only tiring myself out, but I was creating a negative, acidic environment in the one place I had sought refuge.  My imagination.  I was engaging in a full-on, Pay-Per-View worthy boxing match where I played both parts in the ring.  So my left hook was firmly planted on my own right cheek.  In writing this, I’d like to say that I immediately turned my negative thoughts into positive recognition about how great this person was at playing the political game or developing their loyal following or even how much they loved their dog.  But let’s not be ridiculous, this is supposed to be about authenticity.

You may or may not have noticed that I don’t go by the name “Dalai Lama”, “Mother Theresa”, “Nelson Mandela” or “Jesus”.  All wonderful souls mind you, but let’s just say I haven’t evolved to that level of lightness just yet.  What I can say is that I started (with great effort) looking at this individual and searching for anything positive to associate with them like, “the teal in that top is my favorite color” or “their laughter is bringing joy to someone right now”.  Some days I could only find “at least their exhale of carbon dioxide is helping a plant grow somewhere”, but progress is progress after all. Following only one week of this, I honestly felt better.  Really.  Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t start viewing this supervisor with loving adoration, but I did feel more love in my heart.  I don’t know why it worked other than to say that when you fill your mind with more love, everything else seems to follow.  Your mind is a powerful machine, make sure you are using it to your advantage and in a way that brings you joy and love…and screw the crappy supervisors of the world.  They’ll just have to figure that out on their own.

If you would like to partner up and work on living a life by design, then an Empowerment Session is for you! Take advantage of the complimentary strategy session!

If you’d like special offers, updates, and insider-only goodies, SUBSCRIBE to be a VIP! (It’s free and I won’t blow up your in-box!)

email April@AuthenticLifeChronicles.com 

Comments

  1. Carol Romer says:

    Thank you April. I have known and believed these principals for many years now, although at times I have been “stuck” virtually unable to move forward on a positive path. I love the actual step by step transformation you took. I will draw upon your story for my own strength during those challenging times. PEACECarol

Trackbacks

  1. […] I’m Rubber You’re Glue…For Grown-ups […]

Add Your Comment

*